Awkward!
Tuesday, November 12, 2019 at 09:58PM We’ve all seen them. Those awkward couples at a restaurant with nothing to say, gazing desperately at the wine list, other diners, the décor, their phones, anywhere but at their partner.
I never want to be one of them. I’m so paranoid about this, I’ve been known to take a post-it note with a list of conversation topics on dinner dates with my husband. An agenda for the evening, if you like, just in case what might feel like companionable silence at home, looks to others as though we are bored.
We’ve been together for over 40 years and I continue to find my bloke both fascinating and funny but sometimes we’ve just said everything for the time being.
This happens particularly when we are travelling together for some weeks, as we did not long ago. In our normal lives, we are at work all day, with all sorts of little adventures or gossip to share in the evening when we get home.
When we have been together 24/7 however, no matter how spectacularly wonderful our day has been - eating fish and chips al fresco on a tiny Scottish island, canoeing down the Dordogne, climbing a ruggedly beautiful gorge in Crete - we shared every moment. There is nothing to tell that we don’t already know. And when travelling we eat out a lot more frequently than at home so there is a plethora of opportunities for being exposed in a public place, potentially looking bored with each other!
The Instagram or Facebook photos people share from exotic locations are happy and shiny. In my experience, travel is mind-blowingly different and gorgeous, and great fun. But there are some awkward couple moments too, which we don’t tend to capture on camera. I am obsessive about checking if we still have our passports and bankcards; my companion is, shall we say, more laid back. I want to do a major hike most days, while he would be happy reading by the pool. Not to mention the tension of driving and navigating in countries where people drive on the right-hand side of the road.
These are a mere smattering of difficult moments in days of wonder. The dinner date thing, however, that’s more than a moment. It can be an entire evening filled with the anxiety of looking like one of those couples who no longer have anything to say to each other. Next time we go away a deux, I’m taking my post-it notes.
This was published in The Melbourne Age on 12 November 2019
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